<?xml version="1.0"?>       <!DOCTYPE package PUBLIC "+//ISBN 0-9673008-1-9//DTD OEB 1.0 Package//EN"         "http://openebook.org/dtds/oeb-1.0/oebdoc1.dtd"><html><head><meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/x-oeb1-document; charset=utf-8" /><link rel="stylesheet" type="text/x-oeb1-css" href="devil.css" /><title>The Devil&#8217;s Dictionary: V</title></head><body lang="en-US">  <h1>V</h1> <p class="entry"><span class="def">valor</span>, <span class="pos">n.</span> Asoldierly compound of vanity, duty and the gambler’s hope.</p> <p>“Why have you halted?” roared the commander of a division and Chickamauga, who had ordered acharge; “move forward, sir, at once.”</p> <p>“General,” said the commander of the delinquent brigade, “I am persuaded that any furtherdisplay of valor by my troops will bring them into collision with the enemy.”</p> <p class="entry"><span class="def">vanity</span>, <span class="pos">n.</span> Thetribute of a fool to the worth of the nearest ass.</p> <div class="poem"><p class="poetry">They say that hens do cackle loudest when<br />There’s nothing vital in the eggs they’ve laid;<br />And there are hens, professing to have made<br />A study of mankind, who say that men<br />Whose business ‘tis to drive the tongue or pen<br />Make the most clamorous fanfaronade<br />O’er their most worthless work; and I’m afraid<br />They’re not entirely different from the hen.<br />Lo! the drum-major in his coat of gold,<br />His blazing breeches and high-towering cap—<br />Imperiously pompous, grandly bold,<br />Grim, resolute, an awe-inspiring chap!<br />Who’d think this gorgeous creature’s only virtue Is that inbattle he will never hurt you?</p> <p class="citeauth">Hannibal Hunsiker</p></div> <p class="entry"><span class="def">virtues</span>, <span class="pos">n.</span>pl. Certainabstentions.</p> <p class="entry"><span class="def">vituperation</span>, <span class="pos">n.</span> Saite,as understood by dunces and all such as suffer from an impediment in their wit.</p> <p class="entry"><span class="def">vote</span>, <span class="pos">n.</span> Theinstrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and awreck of his country.</p> </body>    </html>